Puppies Law

OK Human friends, I want to state that we puppies are very intelligent.
Why is it that 'Man is always innocent until proven guilty'?
But Puppies are always guilty, even before they are proven guilty!
I'm getting tired of taking the blame for everything.
Take yesterday for instance, someone in our house was given a soft cuddly stuffed Golden Retriever for Easter, now this puppy had the nerve to sit on the couch, am I allowed up there, no I am not!
Well I don't really know how this puppy got into the garden, (might do?) but if he wanted to play who was I to say no to a game. He wasn't much of a playmate anyway, didn't even put up a fight. Weakling. Next thing I heard was a shriek from an upstairs window, people came flying out into the garden to 'rescue' this animal, so he looked a little grubby, he was in the flower bed what did he expect going in there!
Then guess what, he gets better treatment than I do, its"oh poor thing, look at you, you're so dirty, come here I'll clean you up, did the nasty little puppy get you?"
Give me a break, I'll get him I was here first!
Take him to the vets!
So they bathe him and lay him in the sun to dry (unfortunately out of my reach) and then they come looking for me.
I sit there with my 'Oh I'm so cute look' and do they give me the benefit of the doubt, No. Guilty with no trial. I'm not the only dog here, could have been the big black one, you know the type sits back with that look on their face, 'The younger generation today, I wouldn't have done anything like that, I behaved myself'
So I wandered through the house I've learnt how to behave, you just lower your head and they feel sorry for you, always works: "oh come here, just don't do it again okay" they pat my head and everything is back to normal, except I forgot to go back outside and got taken short as I passed the hall rug, oops. Run!.............................